NOW My Night with Francesco
Lying on my bed earlier, writing the entry this evening, I had no idea I was going to have the most amazing night tonight! Francesco called and asked if I was hungry.

(he was supposed to be on the North Shore tonight and seeing me tomorrow for a haircut and viewing of his movie. Last night he had a huge party for the premiere of his film, and Wednesday he moves to L.A. I missed the party because I was at Sergio's Memorial Fundraiser, which was my funeral for Sergio. Karen went and it was an insane party, great screening, Francesco lost the film in hard drive and was totally late starting the film, the guest were interesting and random but brilliant and it all ended skinny dipping at the beach in Lanikai. I wished I had been at the party part.)

So Francesco calls and asks if I'm hungry...he's on his way to my favorite restaurant for his final meal of my favorite meal, the kobe burger panini. I went and met him at Formaggio, a peaceful night there and Francesco at a corner table, half way through his burger, with roasted vegetables on the side! We immediately started talking about film and his film and my film and the experience of doing the exact same thing I did, except his was made while he was in a cult, and mine isn't done. He shared my diet coke and I bought his dinner. Then we went to his house to cut his hair and watch his movie. Yum.
After talking to Louie, we hung out in the kitchen and couldn't talk faster or laugh harder or have a more interesting conversation and then he took his shirt off. He is so perfectly beautiful. We then decided to cut his hair in the office with a mirror and plant perfectly placed. We talked.
Then back to Louie and the kitchen for cookies and popcorn, which he burnt in the microwave but we ate anyway because we were Hiigh Cllairee.
So then he grabs the standing thing that looked like a speaker, pulled it open into a huge screen, has me sit on the couch right in front of the screen, and I get my OWN PRIVATE SCREENING WITH FRANCESCO. So I got to go to Francesco's party after all, but I only saw Francesco the whole night. No noise, rude guests, weirdos, freeks or geeks.....just gorgeous him and me playing all over his house and being totally engaged every second. We watched his films and discussed them while we did, I spoke freely and loud. I loved them for the most part.
They are beautiful and he has amazing skills. He's profound. and yet not.
We discussed what i liked about them for a very long time. And then we go to his desk and watch the way it was before, other options, new cool scenes, AND THEN... we watch the other film and it was the most beautiful one. B E A U T I F U L one.
I could explain it all but it doesn't even matter. I was just floating around another planet and so beautiful, inspiring, romantic, artistic, I will think of this night forever.
Unless I actually wind up with him. Wouldn't that be a long way around. But Oh to Be So Lucky.
I could love him. I do, actually.

It is um...Monday, the 15th of September. How can it have been over a week since I finished PSI? It feels like a minute. They said I was on a PSI high. I don't remember. I do know that I still don't feel like the same person I was before PSI but it is a little more normalized now. Now I definitely feel like its time to do the work.
Interesting thoughts since PSI:
I spent the first three days telling my closest circle they should go to the Basic. So far Karen and Jennifer Quinn have signed up and payed, Lisa Maria and Sean are still working it out, Mo is making her plan to come here and go in October and Shelly is going to San Francisco in October.
Kola isn't saying no, Cheryl thinks its cute and Gloria asks why she should go if she already knows it already, and Colleen has gone home to trick her husband into going to SF too, in October. Annie will go in December and a few other people are waiting to hear about it from me still. I still have to do all my clients at the end of September so I'm planning for at least 10 more for October.
So what I realized after a few days was that I was spending all my time getting others to go and not doing what I needed to for myself. Malosi helped me figure this through and Karen has become a watch dog for my inner monster, selling me out for others.
Malosi said, "Make the things serve you, don't let you serve them." great advice.